I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
