Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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