It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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