I'm really into asian looking animals
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
