she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
