So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
