Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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