We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
