Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get me chipped asap
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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