went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So much rum. So many feels.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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