The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
