THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Randomize
