Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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