I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
