Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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