this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
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