you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize