That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
