so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I am one with the molecules
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
