Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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