The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
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One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
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Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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