Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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