hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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