oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
