My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
