so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
