The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize