I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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