I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
