i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
