how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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