I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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