I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
