it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
