hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
