You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
