Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
