I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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