would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
