im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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