Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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