So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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