Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize