Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
