when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
