Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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