I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
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I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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