K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
