so explain again why im purple
no
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize