I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
